Saturday, 10 September 2016

Our last Ramadhan and Raya together

Assalamu'alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh~

Hey.

It's been awhile since the last time I posted something here. Sorry.

Life has been tough for me.

When I wrote my last post, I was in Korea. Well, that was months ago. I spent 4 months away from my country and my family. It was tough but I gained a lot of experience and achieved quite a lot of stuffs that I thought I would never be able achieved.

Maybe, when I have the time, I will share a little bit of my experience and things that I did in Korea.

Anyway, I came back somewhere toward the end of June this year. So basically I have been back here in Brunei for almost three months already.

First of all, Alhamdulillah because I got to spend two weeks of Ramadhan and Hari Raya with my family this year too. If only I was chosen to do my Discovery Year in Japan last time, I wouldn't be able to come back before Raya but I didn't. Allah's plan is always for the best. Alhamdulillah.

I was really happy to spend Hari Raya with my family this year because being away from them for four months was almost unbearable. This year was the best Raya for me... yet... it was also the saddest one...

Yeah...

Because we lost a family member.

10th Syawal... 15th July 2016,

My beloved grandfather, that we all loved a lot, the kind grandfather... the only grandfather I had left at that time...

He passed away. On a Friday morning.

I never thought that this year's Raya was the last Raya that I got to spend with him. Never that I thought he would leave us that day.

I miss him.

I still have so much to talk to him.

I want to apologize for a lot of things.

I haven't been telling him that I love him a lot lately.

The last time I held his hand, I never thought that it would be the last time.

It saddens me a lot that he wouldn't be there on my graduation day next year, waiting for me with a proud smile at the door of my house.

It hurts me a lot.

I miss him a lot.

I miss him a lot.

The house doesn't feel the same again without him though sometimes, I could still feel his presence... His voice is still lingering in my ears and I can still remember everything that he ever said to me and things that he told other people about me.

Ya Allah, please grant my grandfather, Haji Saban bin Sidup your Jannah.

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