I was put in the same group as him. He was the only person I know in the group. The others were from another class. But I never really talked to him in class so I was quite nervous. Then, we were told to discuss about something with everyone in the group. I didn't talk...at all. Not that I didn't want to but I couldn't bring myself to say out even a word. I'm a very talkative person when I'm with my friends but when I'm surrounded by strangers, I become nervous and scared. I think Ikki-san realised it so every time the others tried to make me talk, he covered me up and grabbed away their attention from me. And when they asked me questions, he answered them all for me. I was saved by him. Or was it just my imagination? But I felt very useless. Why can't I talk? Why am I such a coward!? I asked myself. And again, he seemed to notice it. So he moved closer to me and whispered, "It's okay" with that gentle voice of his. My heart skipped a beat at that. Or...was it just my imagination? But somehow, I managed to relax. Thanks to him.
And then, one day, while waiting for the lesson to start, I was sitting alone since Haru-chan was late. There were empty seats around me. But, no one wants to sit next to me. They preferred to sit at another tables. I was all alone, listening to others laugh and conversation. That was when someone pulled the chair next to mine. I looked up to the person. It was Ikki-san. He asked, "Can I sit here?" and sat even before I answer his question. I looked at the table next to us, where all his friends (the boys) were sitting. There were still about three empty seats. But still he chose to sit next to me. Again, he seemed to know what was on my mind. It was like he sat there to keep me company. That time, I was very thankful to him. With him there, I didn't feel alone. He even talked to me and kept flashing that gentle smile. Or...was it just my imagination? Maybe, he was only sitting there because he wanted to focus on the teacher so he didn't sit with his other friends? Or maybe, he didn't realise that there were still empty seats there at the boys' table?
We somehow became close with each other. He borrowed stuffs from me and talked to me a lot. He asked me questions like "What course do you plan to take?" and "What universities do you plan to go?". He always comes out with idea about what to talk about with me. Because of that, I don't feel awkward when he's around me. I don't feel lonely like I was before every time I entered the class. I wake up and go to school every day, looking forward to see him. And when he's not there, I feel empty. Day by day, I become used to him being nice to me. Seeing his smile has now becoming my routine.
Every time he treats me nicely, I feel like I'm very special to him. But then, I realized. He treats others the same way as well . He is just...being nice. Not just to me but everyone else. That is when it hit me. To him, I'm just a friend. He sees me just as a friend. Like how he sees the others. He is just being nice and friendly...because that is his character. His smile, is also not just for me but everyone else too.
It hurts...It really hurts. Because... I was too late in realizing that fact. I'm already fell in love. With him.
Ikki-san...
- Miki Ariake
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