My first love story

Konbanwa! Ogenki desu ka, minna-san?

Good Evening! How are you guys?

As usual, today is another one boring day of my life.

But, today is also a day that I will not forget.

For the first time, my History lecturer complimented me!

I was so surprised that I didn't know how to react.

So I just smiled and bowed at her words but actually inside I was screaming in happiness.

Today, in History class, don't know why but it seemed like my lecturer was in a very good mood.

She talked about her past experience with her previous students.

We was like "Eh!?" when she told us that 2 years ago, two of her students got pregnant.

So, she told us to be careful and don't trust boys too much and also, it is better to have no boy friend at this time.

My mother said the same too. Just focus on study first.

And that is what I'm doing right now.

For 17 years I lived in this world, I never have a boy friend, even once.

It's not that no one likes me! I've been confessed to three times.

I rejected them all.

But, I think this is better because if I have a boy friend, my result would be worser than what I got last time.

So, I choose to continue being a single.

Talking about this boy friend thingy, I suddenly feel like sharing the story of my first love.

I fell in love for the first time was when I was in grade 3 in elementary school. I was about 7-8 years at that time. Yeah, I know. I was still too young to know what is love at that time!

He was from the same class as me. We already been put in the same class since I first entered the school.

I never realized him before but in grade 3, something happened.

It was during Physical education period. We were told to just do anything we wanted at the field.

I was playing with my friends when suddenly I tripped and my foot got stuck in a small hole near the field.

I tried to pull my leg but I failed. My friends also tried their best to help me but none of them could do it.

I nearly cried but then he came. He knelt down in front of me and slowly he helped me to pull my foot out of the hole. Thank God, he did it! He took my hand and helped me to stand.

That was when I thought that he looked so awesomely cool!

Since that incident, I started to notice him in the class.

I loved to stare at him when teacher was teaching in front.

I just realized that, he was a funny person and loves to make jokes.

He was also a good looking guy. His smile...his eyes...his mouth...everything...it looked perfect to me.

Sometimes, he caught me staring at him and quickly, I looked away, blushing madly!

It was all fine until one day... during grade 6... I was around 11 years old.

We suddenly got into a fight. A big one.

I almost slap him hard on the face...and his face was all red because of angriness.

It was all started because of a misunderstood.

Since then, we never talk to each other anymore. We were like strangers every time we met.

But, my feeling for him was still there. I wanted to talk to him again and tell him that I like him... but I couldn't.

He hated me. It was all because of that stupid misunderstood!

It stayed like that until we graduated from elementary school.

Again, we went to the same middle school but different class.

Thinking that maybe because it was fate, I decided to confess to him and YES, I DID.

And his answer was...he rejected me.

I was so heart broken!

I've been liking him since in grade 3 but when I finally gained the courage to confess, he rejected me.

I couldn't stop crying that day.

After a few days after the confession, I found out that he was actually dating someone from my class. My own classmate. Again, it was another shock.

But yeah, she was far much better than me...she was also beautiful and smart.

After that I decided to forget him. I thought it was easy...

but I only able to completely erase my feeling for him after 4 years.

That was the ending of my first love.

When we graduated from middle school, we finally able to talk like before. In other words, we became friends again. I'm glad that even though he doesn't like me but at least he still wanted to be my friends.

I don't know where is he right now.

My last time meeting him was during the final exam in high school.

I didn't see him on the graduation day.

It is now May so that means it is already like 7 months I don't see him.

I wonder where is he right now...

I hope he's doing fine.

I shouldn't care about him anymore since I no longer have feeling for him but he was the man that taught me what is LOVE... So, I will never forget him.

I'm SAVED!

Good news! Good news! Good news!

The presentation was a SUCCESS!

I'm so happy! My lecturer gave good comment on our presentation.

She also said, "Good Job, Miki"

Kyaa! That really made my day!

I know this post is short, but I'm tired already so I'm going to sleep :)

Oyasumi.

Tired ~

Today was a very tiring day! Even though, it was holiday...
Let's just start from the very first thing that happened today.
I woke up at 8 am, then my mother told me to cook for my little sister and I did.
Before she went out for work, she ordered me to clean all the dishes and do the house work. Of course I did too. I can't disobey her, ya know.
My father was so lazy to cook today so we only ate instant me for break fast and lunch.
When I was about to relax and take a nap, my friend phoned me telling that she was coming to my house.
So, I canceled the plan to sleep.
Me and my friend did our last preparation for tomorrow's presentation.
This was her first time coming to my house so I was kinda embarrassed with my so messy room.
After, my father asked me to help my little HUGE brother with his school project.
Because I needed the internet so he sent me and my friend to the cyber cafe.
BUT, the cyber was having some errors with the computer so we have to look for another one.
Unfortunately, we couldn't find one and so the project was left undone as we went home.
My friend's father came and picked her up at my house.
When night came, my father brought me with my lap top to my mother's working place with the hope, we could use the internet there, but again...luck was not at our side.
Disappointed, we went home.

Well, as usual...today was a boring day... =.="
That's all.
Bye.

Today was...FUN!

Yo!
Just like what the title says, I had fun today!
No class at all! Wait...there was one but still it was fun!
I woke up early this morning just to finish my assignment.
But then, I remembered that today, there wouldn't be any class.
Because we were all (sociology students) going to the mall to check out the Police exhibition!
So, in the end, I didn't finish my assignment and until now, the paper is still laying on the bed without anything written on it.

We were going to the mall by bus, since I'm not really close with the people in my class so I just sat alone in the bus. Well, I do close with some of them but...Min Ki is a guy, so it's kinda weird to sit next to him in the bus, and then...Nao was sitting with her other friend, ignoring me. I don't really care about that since I think sitting alone is much better than have to desperately think of how to start a conversation or what to talk about with the one sitting next to you, right?

Reached at the mall, Min Ki was the who talked to me first. For the first time, I'm glad to have him. At least, I got someone to walk with. Not just him but also my other friends from my high school. Although they already got new friends, they still want to be my friends. It was still early when we arrived there so most of the shops were still closed and the exhibition have not yet started so we were told to roam around. The exhibition started an hour after we arrived there. It was fun! I've gained a lot of knowledge by coming to this exhibition. The exhibition was all about Police and for the first time, I held a gun! A real gun! Kyaaa! It was heavy but seriously, so COOL! I wanted to take it home but of course I can't.

I wanted to be there more but we had to go back to school since it was time already. This time, I got into another bus so everyone around me was different from the first one, except for Min Ki. Just like the first, I sat alone. We arrived at school just in time for the last period. At first, I was planning not to come into the class but...since the other three students that are in the same class as me decided to come into the class, I had no choice but to follow them. In the class, my lecturer was actually waiting for us to start the presentation. Luckily, it was not my group to present today so I was saved but on Monday, not anymore. I need to get ready for the presentation.

Tomorrow, will be a busy day for me. I will have to finish all the assignments that are suppose to be passed up on Monday or I will be dead. I don't want to die yet! I haven't meet Nakajima Yuto yet!

Okay, it is now already almost 8:30 pm. I want to sleep early tonight so that tomorrow, I won't be sleepy the whole day. Thanks for reading this (although I'm pretty sure, no one is reading actually =.=")
Oyasuminasai.

I cut my hair SHORT!!

Yo!!
Remember what was I talking about this morning?
About my mother.
She finally talked to me again!!
Yay! And today when I was about to get out of the car with my friends, she gave me some money without me asking for it.
I was so shocked at first but YAY! haha xD

Today, I went to a restaurant to do some school's projects with my friends. My grandmother came with us. Man, she's annoying. I hope my friends didn't mind. They all looked enjoying it. I mean, my grandmother's silly stories. I didn't finish the project there because my grandmother wanted to go somewhere and I had to come with her. We left my friends in the restaurant and waited for a bus (at the bus stop of course!) By the bus, we went to the town. There, my grandmother ate breakfast at her favourite restaurant while I just sat next to her, doing nothing but watching all the people around me. After that, we walked to my mother's walking place and there, my mother brought me to the nearest saloon and I cut my hair SHORT! I'm happy with my new hair! I love short hair since I was small. Yes, I'm kinda boyish.

At night, I went to attend a Japanese language class with my friend. Let just call her... Suki-chan. The class was fun! As usual! We laughed a lot. I really enjoyed the class. Eh? Why am I learning Japanese? Because I want to be able to speak Japanese. Ah, I didn't tell you? I'm not a Japanese. I'm a...should I reveal it? Alright. I'm a Bruneian.

I think that's all.
Oyasuminasai.
Bye.

I hate this feeling of guilty

Okay, last night my mother came into my room just to scold me.
As what I wrote on the very first post, I love to talk back.
And that was what I did yesterday.
I talked back.

And this morning, I woke up early and so did her.
She saw me walking out of my room but guess what?
Yes, she ignored me.
Man, this is what I hate the most.
I don't know when will she start talking to me again.
This is way too annoying.
I hate being ignored especially by my mother.
Everyone would feel the same, right?
Well, maybe some are happy when their mothers don't seem care about them but not me.
It makes me feel guilty.
This isn't the first time but I think this is the most serious one ever happened.
Normally, I would just let her be because I know eventually she would talk to me again.
But today, I need her help.
I'm going out with my friends to do some school project but of course I need some money for that.
The problem is I have no money. The only way is to ask for it from my mother.
What? I don't work, okay? I'm still 17 years old! It is still compulsory for me to go to school! Well, in my case, it is college.
I can do part time, but when the heck am I going to have the time?
I go to college at 6 in the morning and go home at 2 pm. And sometimes I have to stay at college until 4:30 doing some group discussion!
Homework is given almost everyday!
And every week there's always project, either group presentation or individual.
See, when do I have the time?
That is why I don't go to work.

Okay, back to main point. Now, how am I going to talk to my mother?
This is bad...

Two boring days...

Konbanwa, minna-san.

Good evening, everyone.

I don't know what to talk about for tonight. I opened this blog is just because I feel like writing.
Yesterday and today were somehow normal.
Let's first talk about yesterday.
At first, I was so worried about how should I answer my lecturers if they ask me why didn't I attend the classes on last Tuesday.
But, it turned out...none of the four lecturers ask me the question.
Of course, I felt so weird but who cares, at least I'm saved.
My friends told me that they had already been given their essay paper and most of them got marks lower than 10! I was so shocked! Lower than 10? Even my friend who is good in English only got 7. So, I couldn't help it but to feel nervous about my own paper. When I finally received the paper, slowly I checked on the mark and YAY! I got 12! Well, it's still a fail but at least I got higher than 10. There was also some comment written by my lecturer on the back paper. She wrote a positive comment. Fuh, I'm saved again.
And then, during sociology class, my lecturer showed us a video about a man who was...err, how should I say it? Gayish? Yes, gay but he wasn't actually a gay. It was a funny video and we couldn't stop laughing even after the class ended. Lunch time, I was told to see my History lecturer to talk about the lesson that I missed during my absence. She was in a good mood, I mean my lecturer. I stayed there in her room listening to her talking for an hour. After lunch, it was my Geo and we got a test. I didn't prepare at all so the questions were kinda hard for me. So that's it. One boring day of my boring life.

And now, today. I'm sure I haven't tell you this. Remember the ex friend that I talked about in my previous post? Actually, everyday we came to school in the same car. Because my father is too kind, he allowed her to come with us in MY car since she got no one to send her to school. Can you imagine it? Every morning the first person (Who is not in the family) you meet is your most hated person. What do you think of it? Sucks, isn't it? That is what I feel! I hate her! I hate her!

In Geography class, we was told to do a mind map for the coming individual presentation starting next week. My topic is EASY compared to my friends! Thank God. But I haven't do any research yet so tomorrow I'm going to do a group discussion with two of my friends. Sociology, I almost fall asleep. Why? My lecturer, showed us four videos and all four were BORING! But then, he told us a good news! We are a going to have and trip to a 'Police Exhibition' on Saturday so that means, I'm going to skip my English AS, Geography and History class! YAY! In English AS class today, we was told to write the most cliched plot ever and my group chose the genre romance.

Here's our most cliched plot.

A girl and a boy were best friend since they were small.
The boy fell in love with the girl but she didn't know.
She had her own dream guy and finally she met one.
She confessed to the dream guy and became his girlfriend.
The best friend got jealous but he just let it be.
Until, the dream guy hurt her.
He was just playing with the girl's heart.
The girl cried and went to the boy, the best friend.
The boy comforted her.
The girl finally realized that she loved him.
And they lived happily ever after.
The END.

How was it?
Cliched enough, right?

I went home at 2 pm and because I was so tired, I immediately fell asleep when I reached my room. I just woke up at 9 pm. My mother got back from her work and came to scold me. That was why I awake. If not because of her, I would still be sleeping right now.
That's all for tonight. I will write again soon.
Oyasuminasai.

Do you guys believe in TRUE FRIEND?

Yo, I'm back again.
First of all...I want to scream out loud.
WHAT A BAD DAY TODAY!!!!!! Arghhhh!!!
Luckily, I didn't go to college today... Starting next year, every May 17...I will just lock myself in my room.
First the washing machine was making fun of me, then my mother gave me a SUPER LONG lecture, after that, I was told to do all the housework for the day, then my grandfather also gave me a -short- lecture, I almost broke my fingers when I was helping my father carrying the stupid washing machine out from the bathroom and worst...I stepped on Chi-nyan's poo!

Okay, now straight to the point.
Do you guys believe in TRUE FRIENDS?
My answer would be YES but can also be NO.
Sometimes I believe in it and sometimes no.
What is TRUE FRIEND actually?
I don't really understand.
I'm having a fight with one of my friend right now, or should I say my ex-friend?
I will just use EX then since I don't consider her as my friend anymore.
She was my friend since I was still in first year of my middle school.
We were close with each other but, she always said something that hurt my feeling.
Because I think as a friend, I should accept her the way she is so I easily forgave her.
But then, after 5 years being friends with her...I realized that I can't bear with her anymore.
She talked behind me with my other friends. I don't mind if she talks about something nice but she was trying to make me look bad in the other's eyes.
I don't know what was her intention.
But, one thing for sure, I'm so disappointed.
When I recalled back, this was NOT the first time she did that. Why was I'm so damn stupid? I should have realized it earlier, she is NOT a friend at all.
Since that, I never talk to her anymore. I tried as much as I can to distance myself from her.
Of course, the others noticed it. There were some people who came to me and asked what is actually happening between me and her. I didn't give them an answer. I'm pretty sure they would ask her the same question too and I don't care with how she would answer them.
I don't care anymore.
I don't care what people would think about me after listening to her answer.
I won't forgive that girl.

Back to the question,
I do have some friends who are like...I don't know if I should say that they are my true friends, but they are always there when I need them.
They care about me a lot.
They say they love me so many times.
They make me feel...I'm not alone.
We laugh together.
We share so many things together.
Without them, I feel so lonely and that is what I'm feeling right now.
They have no time for me anymore.
Sometimes, I feel like I'm being ignore.
Sometimes, I feel like they are leaving me.
Sometimes, I feel like they don't love me anymore.
I always think about stuffs like
'Maybe, they have found some new friends'
'Maybe, they have forgotten about me'
'Maybe, they don't enjoy the times they have spent with me'
'Maybe, I'm really a boring person'
Those negative thinking always come into mind.
Me and them are not going to the same college...
I miss them. But, are they feeling the same way?
I wonder...
I wonder...
I wonder, is there anyone out there who consider me as his or her TRUE FRIEND?
I don't know...

What a bad start for the day...

Hey, I'm back.
I just noticed that I forgot to talk about myself in my last post.
By the way, there is not so much interesting things to talk about myself so just scroll down and skip this part if you don't want to get bored or maybe fall asleep.


As you already know, Miki is not my real name. I'm a 17 years old college student.
Honestly, I don't really know what to talk about. Well, I'm a quiet person and quite shy with everyone but when I'm with my close friends, I'm a different person that can't stop talking and joking around.
I'm not good in making new friends so I just wait for people to come to me and ask to be my friends.
I always got bad result in my study which is one of  the result why my mother is getting more strict on me recently.
I love sport but I don't like doing it. Why? Because I'm bad at it - all kind of sport, except badminton...maybe-
I love school but I hate study! Since I entered college life, assignments are always my major problem. I hardly finish on time and end up making my lecturers mad.
I can speak three languages. I'm not telling you what are those three languages but obviously, English is one of them. Maybe, I'm not really good with grammars and stuffs - English is NOT my first language -
I like the colour BLACK. Kuro/black is cool, right? But, every time people asked me my favourite colour, they all went 'EEEEEHHHHH?' when I answered 'black'
So weird...What is wrong with liking black? Black is far much better that pink. I really don't like pink. I know I'm a girl but do all girls have to like pink? Obviously, NO.
Love life...unlike all my friends, I'm a lonely girl. Never once in my 17 years living in this world I ever have a boyfriend. But, to tell the truth, I fall in love easily - and of course break my heart easily too -
For now, I am in love with someone for about 3 and a half already. Someone that is far away from me. Someone that doesn't even know that I'm exist in the world. Who? Nakajima Yuto. I'm sure most of you know him. He's an idol. A 17 years old idol.
Okay, enough about me. I don't want everyone to fall asleep.


The title up there says "What a bad start for the day..."
For your information, it is only 6 in the morning right now. Usually, at time like this, I should be in the car on the way to college but I'm still in my room right now. Yes, I'm skipping the classes for today.
Yesterday, I went home from college at 2 pm, I was so tired but when I was planning to have a rest, someone came and of course as the first daughter in the family, I must sit there listening to elders talking.
Finally, they went home and around 5pm. I immediately went up to my room and fell asleep. When I woke up this morning, it was already 4 am. Then, that was when I remembered that I haven't wash my uniform! It was still two hours to go before 6 so I quickly washed them. But, the washing machine was making fun of me. The dryer was not working... So, there is no way I'm going to college without my uniform, right? There is only one choice...skip classes for today. Of course my mother won't stay quiet about it! She came bursting into my room just now and started lecturing me. It was a LONG lecture.
What a bad start for the day... and also for tomorrow where I have to give ALL MY FOUR LECTURERS a reason on why I didn't attend the classes today.
I'm dead if I don't prepare an excuse now.


That's all for today. I maybe post another post again later.
Bye.


- Miki Ariake

This is the start...

Konbanwa! Watashi no namae wa Ariake Miki desu.
17 sai desu.
Douzo yoroshiku onegaishimasu!

Good evening! My name is Miki Ariake.
I'm 17 years old.
Nice to meet all of you.

You guys can just call me Miki. To tell you the truth, that is not my real name. I won't expose my real name here. I want to but I just can't. I am 17, that is NOT a lie. Why am I creating this blog?
Well, because I'm a forgetful person and I love writing (sharing) the story of my life for other people to read. I don't know why so don't ask me why. Sounds like a lonely person talking, right? Yes, I am.

Honestly, there is not much to write about my life. Only one word can describe it and the one word is 'BORING'. That's true. My life is boring. I'm the first daughter from a not so rich but not so poor family. I have 3 little brothers and 1 little sister. My father is unemployed so he just spend his time doing the chores at home while my mother, a busy business woman, go to work. So, in other words, my father is the househusband and my mother is the one that makes money for the family. We live under the same roof with my grandparents. So, did you count? A father, a mother, three brothers, one sister, a grandfather, a grandmother... 8 people. Wait, plus me and my cat (Does my cat count?) so it is 10 people living in the house.
Pretty crowded, isn't?

Now, let's first talk about my father (Rui Ariake). He is a nice person with a kind smile. He got a job before, a GOOD job actually but because of some unavoidable problems, he had to quit. Not because he was fired! He didn't do anything bad...It was just... there was no other choice but to quit the job. I'm not really that close with my father but we do talk sometimes...

My mother (Yuu Ariake), she's really a scary person. She loves to scold me and I love to talk back. She's always strict with me especially when it comes to my study. She always say that I must do my best in my study, I must get an excellence result, I must get a good job, I must get married to good (and rich) man. I don't understand a thing at first but then I slowly get to understand. She's hoping me to change my family's life. Actually, my mother is not that bad. She's just like other mothers in this world. She's caring, hardworking and wants the best for the family.

Next is my three little brothers. The first brother is Keii Ariake. He is a famous, good looking and a trouble maker 16 years old boy. A high schooler. When I said famous...I really meant it. He is a well known play boy in school. He keeps changing girlfriends like every weeks! Unbelievable, right? I don't know why there are so many girls who like him. He's a TROUBLE-MAKER! Loves to have a fight =.=
The 2nd brother is Kenta Ariake. He's...too quiet. At school...at home...he's too quiet. I don't know why but he rarely talks. Ah, forgot to tell the age. He is 14, a middle schooler.
And the 3rd one is Ryouta Ariake. He loves to eat! And he's really HUGE! Too huge for his age, he's only 9 but he looks like 12 above. I always get into fight with this HUGE boy. He's very rude when he starts talking.

About my grandparents...there is not so much to talk about. My grandfather, Toichi Ariake, he's already reached the age of 80 but he's still looks so energetic and he often gets angry at us. He's a very religious person. My grandmother (Yoko Ariake), 72, is a very annoying old woman. I'm not being rude but she is annoying. Just like my grandfather, she's still strong and active and...nags a lot.

Oh ya, I forgot my little sister. Miko Ariake. She's 7 years old. Still an elementary kid. In the family, she's the closest one to me. We shared the same interest. She's like the mini me...BUT, she's more to girly stuffs while I'm more to boyish stuffs.

About my cat, I don't know how old is he but he's always living with us since about 3 years ago. We named him Chi-nyan. Cute name, right? I was the one who came out with the idea. Btw, Chi-nyan is BLACK.

I guess, thats all for tonight since I don't know what else to talk about.

Oyasuminasai.

- Miki Ariake